They say gratitude is all about contrast. Where and who I am today is starkly different from the person I was 5 years ago, and while that person struggled with self worth, love, anger, and shame — I am deeply grateful.
“In order to appreciate the light, one must spend time in darkness.”
I’ve come to learn that even my dark moments served a purpose. I was sad, I was angry, and I was hurt — I could have turned away from these emotions, as I had done before, but this time I had too much on the line to run away. I had my first serious relationship that I was fighting for and these painful emotions were affecting both of us. For the first time, I faced these emotions head on to ask myself the most freeing question: why?
Why was I sad? Why was I angry? Why was I hurt?
These questions were not beyond me. I knew the answer but was ashamed to express it. The initial answer was simple: I had experienced trauma throughout my childhood. It was the follow up question that I had no answer for.
My therapist asked me how my childhood trauma was affecting my current relationship.
I had never considered that the possibility of my past, which I purposefully left 400 miles behind upon moving to college, could still haunt me. I was naive to assume physical distance would remedy the issue. The question of ‘how’ began my exploration of myself, the hurt child in me, my family and my then boyfriend.
My therapist helped me find parallels, draw lines and connect dots. She also helped me sever lines in order to break free from old pain and find healing. My therapist did not give me all the answers to my life, but she enabled me to find enlightenment. As a result, I was able to find clarity and some logic to my struggles. During this dark time she challenged me to find my light and to answer: what makes me happy?
My list is simple: sunbathing, writing, laughing, my dog, playing soccer, exploring and life chats.
I learned therapy is a form of light. It’s not a light that can only be found in the reclining chair of your therapist’s office. It’s not a light that needs to be bought. It’s not a light that is reserved for only a select few.
It is clarity that can be found when your mind is most free. When your thoughts can see out of the darkness to find truth in the light. While I have found some truth along the way, my journey is not over. To this day, when I struggle, I turn to my happy list to find my therapy, to find my truth.
What’s your therapy?
Share your therapy with Simone and The InSight Bulletin by tagging us on Facebook or Twitter and including #MyTherapy in your photo. Every week we’ll be giving away a $50 gift card to the #MyTherapy post with the most engagement. Check out the #MyTherapy page for more info.
“Exploring the unknown opens up my mind to possibilities instead of my daily worries. Whether I’m able to travel to a new country or a new part of my small town, the contrast of different views keeps me humble and grateful #mytherapy #brazil2014”
Simone Laroche believes stories are the most powerful vehicle to connectivity. A creative storyteller from her youth, she channeled this passion into her career after attending Syracuse University – majoring in Communications & Entrepreneurship/Emerging Enterprises. Two years ago she was developing TV shows in Los Angeles, before making the pivot in her journey to intersect her philosophy of businesses for social good. She believes social enterprises are the most powerful and sustainable vehicles to incite change. Simone has since dedicated her skills to help develop strategy, marketing and communications for non-profits and social enterprises. In order to not take life too seriously, Simone enjoys awkward moments, travel, soccer, astrology, outdoor activities, good food and good conversation – also, TED talks are her jam.